Home > ST Forum > Story
Dec 10, 2007

Have we lost the humanity to say 'sorry'?
WHY is it so hard to say 'I am sorry', or 'We apologise' when you make a mistake that vexes others?
It would seem that this inexcusable lapse in common courtesy is widespread, even among the highly educated.
Let me illustrate by sharing an experience of a close buddy of mine.
John (not his real name) went to a renowned hospital one Friday morning for a blood test. Later that day, his doctor asked him to go back for a retest. Reason: an abnormally high level of potassium in his blood that could spell trouble.
Concerned, John made his way back to the hospital after lunch and was made to wait at the A&E unit until 6.30pm (almost four hours) for the result.
The 73-year-old retiree was clearly upset about the painful wait as he recounted his experience.
It turned out that his blood profile was normal after all. Poor John was unceremoniously discharged - no explanation for the discrepancy in the first lab result, no acknowledgement of mistake, and not a word of apology for the false alarm, anxiety and inconvenience caused.
This is odd, especially for a hospital that prides itself on the provision of high-quality patient care. One would think that, as a complement to its excellent medical expertise, the mission of this hospital (or for that matter any decently run hospital) would be better served by the graciousness and sensitivity of its staff.
What happened to John may seem trivial but it is not. Neither is it an isolated incident as the word 'sorry', sad to say, is rarely heard these days when it should be a natural and spontaneous response in such situations.
Perhaps it is the hectic way of life here that has over the years inured many Singaporeans to the point of abject apathy on how decent folk ought to treat one another.
That is sad but we must not find excuses for our shortcomings. This innate and instinctive part of ourselves that makes us human need not be lost forever if we, first, don't allow ourselves to live in denial and, second, make a conscientious effort to change for the better.
The change will take time, but it will be worth it for, if nothing else, we could at least say with some pride (and without apologies!) that we are truly a 'developed nation'.
Lee Seck Kay
http://www.straitstimes.com/ST%2BForum/Story/STIStory_185124.html